Legions of filmmakers working today would love to make a feature horror piece rife with political relevance, originality, poignancy, and, to top it off, something that is *actually* scary. Luckily for we viewers, Phil Guidry, Simon Herbert, and David Whelan managed to do just that. Welcome to Savageland, a place you’ve probably been before if you followed the 2016 US Presidential election (or really if you spend any time watching the news these days).
Legions of filmmakers working today would love to make a feature horror piece rife with political relevance, originality, poignancy, and, to top it off, something that is *actually* scary. Luckily for we viewers, Phil Guidry, Simon Herbert, and David Whelan managed to do just that. Welcome to Savageland, a place you’ve probably been before if you followed the 2016 US Presidential election (or really if you spend any time watching the news these days).
Here is what you should know about Fear Itself going into it. This is a documentary...with a twist. Two twists, actually: 1) There is a scripted, fictional narration over it. The woman speaking to the audience talks about how she recently underwent a trauma and has since become addicted to watching horror movies. As you maybe can guess, her dialogue revolves entirely around our relationship to fear and how the genre affects us. 2) The entire movie is made up of clips from other scary films. These range from the classic to the obscure, in English and otherwise.
Let’s start with the good stuff. I had a WONDERFUL trip down memory lane seeing clips from some of my most beloved movies. Nearly all the scenes chosen are those tension-filled moments before the monster, slasher, creature, or whathaveyou comes into the frame (and yes I do mean ‘nearly’, we’ll come back to that). A great number of those clips are from movies I’ve never seen. I was struck by how cool that was! Whilst watching, I actually started a list of scary films I want to track down ASAP.
I also want to commend director/writer Charlie Lyne for using this unfamiliar tactic of documentary/narrative. I can honestly say I’ve never watched anything with that structure. And yet...I have to be honest, that device did not work for me. It just didn’t. I realize it would have defeated the filmmaker’s whole point, but I really would have benefitted from multiple actors narrating the piece. A change in tone, inflection, pacing, or maybe even accent would have made me more engaged. When I could tune in for pieces of dialogue, I understood that the things she was saying were often interesting and insightful, but the nearly monotonous and unending stream of her voice made it extremely difficult for me to stay focused on what she was saying. I found my mind wandering to either reminiscing on the clips being shown, or thinking, “Oooo, I gotta see that one!” and scribbling the title down in my notebook.
Remember earlier when I said that "nearly" all the scenes were those tension-filled instances right before climactic moments? Well some of them gave away too much. In fact, they were downright spoilers. Just be warned about that going in. Perhaps more problematic than the above is this: what makes so many of those classic movie moments special is how engrossing or captivating they are. The last thing I want, while watching those pieces, is to hear someone speaking over them. No matter how intelligent, observant, or interesting the narration was, her words just couldn't compete with the powerful, frightening, and exciting images on the screen. Some of those visuals are so stunning, they’re what made many of us fall in love with horror. I like to think I can appreciate where Lyne was going with his vision, but it failed to hit the mark for me.
Fear Itself is available for streaming in the UK on BBC online.
~ Sandra (@LilMsMnstr)
Director: Pavel Khvaleev | Writers: Aleksandra Khvaleev, Oleg Mustafin, & Evgenia Mustafin | Release Date: October 2015 | Rating: No MPAA (German/Russian film)
The human mind can be a freaky place to explore. Just ask poor Ayia. She gets a first class ticket to poke around inside her sister’s subconscious and finds it to be a place of torment and agony. Not exactly an ideal vacation spot. But Ayia isn’t visiting for fun. She’s there on a life or death mission. Ayia and Mirra are sisters living in a desolate and tiny European town. A pandemic strikes the little hamlet and claims the life of their mother. Sadly, it’s not long before Mirra also becomes sick from the completely debilitating illness. Ayia turns to their close family friend (and priest) Father Herman for help. Herman reveals that such an illness needs a supernatural solution when traditional medicine falls short. Possessing shamanic books and knowledge, he teaches Ayia how to enter into her sister’s troubled mind. By getting into the nasty, nitty-gritty of the subconscious, Ayia should be able to see what issues are holding Mirra captive in her own brain. Such a journey can only take place between two people who share a deep bond. Bravely, Ayia accepts the challenge in order to save her sister.
Now, this is a horror film. So...as I hinted above, some pretty weird and scary things are going down in Mirra’s subconscious. A movie such as this must rely heavily on visuals. Musty, dreamy, sepia tones transport the audience to this sad and depressing place. Mirra’s world can be described in one word, HELLISH. Fans of Tarsem Singh’s 2000 thriller, The Cell, will feel right at home here. Besides being striking feasts for the eyes, these two films even share the concept of entering the depths of someone’s mind. I like this device. After all, what’s more frightening than what a person is capable of imaging? It leads to endless possibilities. Especially when it comes to symbolically hiding behind their fears and traumas.
As you probably noticed, this is a German/Russian made film. You’re going to have to read subtitles unless you speak Russian. Subtitles are fine by me. In fact, I prefer them over being subjected to sucky dubbing. Actually, there isn’t a ton of dialogue in the movie to begin with. I would rate this as being an above average horror movie worth checking out. Most credit is due to those trippy and beautifully composed visuals. There is certainly a lack of character development. Especially in terms of our heroine, Ayia. I found myself wishing I knew more about her. I was rooting for her to succeed, but there was a missed opportunity there. As someone who is super close to her older sister, I have a bias for stories which feature siblings sacrificing themselves in order to save one another. I won’t lie to you, all in all, the plot is a little sparse. However, despite some imperfections, I still liked taking this weird excursion into a nightmare.
Don’t neglect foreign horror movies, my friends! There are plenty of gems to be found out there. Oh, and please don’t ask me to explain the title. I only kind of understand how it relates.
~ Sandra (@LilMsMnstr)
That’s right, all of ‘em. The good, the bad, The Revenge. As a huge fan of all things shark-related, I jumped at this chance to review all the Jaws films for you fine people. Let’s dive right in. Yes, there are some spoilers here and there; I give fair warning. Just skim over those parts if need be.
What can be said about this beloved horror classic? Jaws is one of the first horror movies I can remember watching. I'll bet a lot of fans would say the same. One of the rare scary movies that breaks down barriers and is celebrated for being a feat of film making. It won three Oscars! Maybe you’ve heard of the film’s director, a fellow named Steven Spielberg? He’s done a few movies here and there over the years. Anyway, did you notice that back in ’75 they rated this movie PG? I somehow don’t think that would fly today.
Jaws is set on Amity Island, a vacation destination gearing up for their busiest weekend, the 4th of July celebration. Chief Martin Brody and his family are new in town. Following a shark attack, Brody is met with opposition from the town council when he tries to close the beach. They’re all worried about scaring away the tourists on the profitable summer weekend. Matt Hooper comes in as an Oceanographer to lend his expertise. He understands the dangers the island faces with the great white on the loose. Some local yahoos catch a tiger shark which Hooper determines couldn’t possibly be our culprit. The stupid and greedy council members eventually listen after another poor sucker dies.
Now, here is when the movie really gets cooking. Brody, Hooper, and shark hunter extraordinaire, Quint, set out on Quint’s boat, The Orca, to hunt down the beast. Quint is one of the best characters in cinematic history, horror or not. He is a snarky old salt who survived the sinking of the USS Indianapolis and the hellish five days it took for those men to be rescued. Many died, many were eaten by sharks. Ugly scene. Quint becomes impassioned and ultimately obsessed with killing the dastardly animal and he manages all this while being a complete badass. Don’t believe me? Just look at that steely gaze:
Should I spoil the ending to a 41-year-old movie? I sincerely hope everyone reading this has seen this masterpiece. If not, consider yourself warned. After some seriously intense action scenes of man vs. shark, Quint is the only one of our crew who gets eaten. And what a horribly slow shark munching death it is! Brody is ultimately the one who gets the job done by blowing the shark to pieces. Every time I watch the movie and see him do this, I cringe thinking that little pieces of partially digested Quint had to be in there. Sad. Brody and Martin swim back to shore, and thus ends one of the best horror movies ever. It is a WONDERFUL film and a great introduction to the genre for a new fan. Actually, it’s essential viewing.
Our hunky heroes.
A mere few years after the the realease of Jaws, audiences were graced with Jaws 2. The rating is the same, but we have a new director this time around. We meet up again with Chief Brody, his wife Ellen, and their two sons, little Sean and teen Mike. I feel like Mike aged rapidly between parts 1 & 2. It does seem important to the filmmakers to have had a much more “youthful” presence this time around. There are simply teens everywhere in this movie; teens boating, teens frolicking, teens flirting, and teens finding dead whales. An early scene shows two young women getting attacked by a great white while water skiing. Upon having her boat and friend compromised, the woman driving inexplicably coats herself in gasoline. I guess she was aiming solely for the shark and...um...missed? She then shoots a flare gun, lighting herself and the beast on fire. Now our antagonist has a nice “Two-Face” appearance from its burns.
This charred shark is really aggressive, almost vindictive. It really hates boats. And helicopters. The main action of the film takes place when the Brody boys sneak off with the other sea-faring teens to have a raging party at the lighthouse. The shark delights in this floating buffet! And Martin takes off to save the kids. God love him, he wears those absurd little short shorts for the whole final act.
*Spoiler Alert* Brody gets the shark to bite a power line and fries the devil up extra crispy. I was especially fond of the black smoke pouring out of its eyes. He saves his sons and the majority of those groovy teens. I guess since Quint is dead, Amity Island needs a new resident bad ass. I totally missed the Matt Hooper character in this one! And while it was more “action-packed” than the first, it just doesn’t live up. It is fun and all, and I do recommend revisiting it if you haven’t seen it in a while.
Okay, let’s get right to the point here. This is less of a film and more of a really long and bizarre commercial for SeaWorld. Seriously. Shamu the famous killer whale even has a damn cameo. As the title suggests, this is a 3-D experience! Not the newfangled 3-D of today mind you, but the kind of yesteryear where things fly at the camera every once in a while.
Young Mike Brody is all grown up and off Amity Island. He has magically turned into a young Denis Quaid and is some kind of construction manager/builder of things for SeaWorld. Mike is dating Kathy, the sweet, senior marine biologist for the park. Eventually, little brother Sean comes to visit, get a job, and stay a while. However, this New England transplant, who has been living in Colorado, has become a water-phobic cowboy. We also welcome Louis Gossett Jr. to the cast as Calvin, the money-grubbing SeaWorld director. As to be expected, a sneaky shark finds its way inside the controlled lagoon. This time, it’s only a baby great white. By the end of the movie, three people manage to get eaten and we, the audience, are shown virtually no carnage or scares. Boring! The special effects in this movie are absolutely HORRIBLE. A personal favorite of mine is any shot with the "submersible" in it. Their attempts are simply embarrassing to behold. By the way, I hope you like dolphins. We get two of those giggly, click-y, little scene-stealers in Jaws 3-D. There are also waterskiers in obnoxious costumes doing tricks.
At one point, some weird British photographers/hunters arrive at the park. As Hollywood as shown us before, these Brits are portrayed with the same stereotypes as their fellow countrymen in almost any animal-themed movie. All they want is fame, fortune, and the thrill of the hunt. Poor baby shark dies in captivity. But the movie doesn’t end there. Aw hell, let’s jump right to the end. *SPOILER ALERT* mama great white, who also managed to stealthly sneak her way into the lagoon, is out to avenge her child. Turns out she was the one killing all those people. What happens next?! Mostly a cheesy, faux shark ends up causing massive amounts of property damage.
This movie is an abomination. It’s not scary, it’s not thrilling, and the body count is depressingly low. Yes, it may be a fun watch for a few laughs, but I couldn’t wait for this deplorable thing to end.
The final instalment! Lorraine Gary reprises her role as matriarch Ellen Brody. Sean Brody is back living on Amity Island and is the new chief of police since papa Brody passed away. Within the first few minutes of the film, Sean gets eaten by a great white. Big brother Michael, along with his wife and little daughter, swoop in to take mom on a tropical vacay to their home in the Bahamas. Ellen has been through a lot; though Martin died of a heart attack, Ellen still blames the sharks for that. And with Sean now dead, she is convinced the vengeful animals have it out for the whole Brody clan. Perhaps needless to say, mom is right. The damn great white follows them and almost wipes out two more family members! Now it’s up to Ellen to kill the shark and end this feud.
Make no mistake, this is not a “good” movie by any means; but, it is kinda fun. Ellen is fierce and I love that. After all, this poor woman has been through so much. The filmmakers are clearly proceeding as if Jaws 3-D never happened, and thank God for that. Michael Caine comes on board as Hoagie, a foot-loose and fancy-free pilot who romances Ellen. The story of a family vendetta between the Brody tribe and the great white sharks is silly, this we know. The whole movie has this forced sentimentality vibe. I think they were trying to make audiences nostalgic for the original movie and how much they loved it when they first saw it. In the interest of completing the saga, and rooting for mama Brody, give it at least one viewing. In closing, please enjoy this image, from the film, of a woman being eaten alive whilst on a banana boat.
~ Sandra @LilMsMnstr
Meet Bea and Paul. Two young newlyweds fresh from the aisle and off on their honeymoon. These two are so cutesy and touchy-feely it just may make you ill. They’re spending this blessed event at Bea’s family cabin in the woods. Of course they picked the perfect time of year for it. The lake will be secluded and empty! No one around to bother or bear witness! Well, almost no one. Bea’s childhood friend, Will, and his wife, Annie, are still there during the offseason. It’s just a bit odd because Will seems rather violent and Annie seems kinda traumatized. During the night, Paul accidentally wakes up too early to go fishing. He is shocked to find Bea has wandered from the house for no apparent reason. After a frantic search, Paul stumbles upon her in the woods, naked and visibly shaken. Slowly but surely, Bea’s behavior starts to change. She becomes forgetful, strange, and not quite herself…
That’s as much as I can tell you about the plot before getting into spoilers. Trust me, I don’t want to spoil this one for you! I want you to watch it and enjoy it as much as I did! I found this movie to be a most impressive directorial debut for Leigh Janiak. Fans of Game of Thrones will recognize actress Rose Leslie as Bea. Both she and costar Harry Treadaway give fantastic performances here. With barely any supporting actors to bounce off of, they have tremendous chemistry to carry this movie.
It was fun to follow the story from start to finish since it definitely kept me guessing a couple of times as to what was really going on. It also poses some interesting questions to the audience: What do you do for your partner when their behavior unexpectedly gets weird? Like, really weird and strange? Suddenly, the course of true love isn’t so nice and smooth. Do you stick it out when things get tough? Or do you throw in the towel? Do you try to help them? Or maybe you should just run away screaming?
As I told you before, I highly recommend checking out this movie. It’s a slow burn, it’s subtle, and it’s worth it.
~ Sandra (@LilMsMnstr)
