Dead Digest: The Walking Dead (SSN 8, Ep 5)

Episode 5: The Big Scary U

Considering this episode opens with a flash back to Father Gabriel praying at the altar for a purposeful death, we knew this episode was going to be a doozy.

Another flashback! This time it was a meeting with Negan and his generals, (Eugene, Simon, Dwight, Regina, and that other guy. He always looks so sad and tired.) talking with Gregory before Maggie/Rick/armies showed up and rained down hell. “The Big Scary U” Gregory speaks of is the “unknown.” Sage words indeed from that slimy creep.

We finally get to see how Negan and Father Gabriel got out of that trailer. Eventually. Before that, we get to hear some really amazing dialogue between the two men. Not to mention we see a softer side of Negan. It does exist! And it’s effectively brought to life by Jeffrey Dean Morgan’s phenomenal acting chops. Gabe refuses to leave the trailer (he even tried to attack Negan!) until he hears the other man’s confession. He thinks God put him right there for this reason. The priest also reminds us of his great sin, leaving his congregation for dead when the outbreak started. It turns out Negan has always had this thing about helping people. He used to work with kids. Whaaaaaa…?

He also used to be married to one, “real” wife. He cheated on her, and she got sick when the apocalypse started. But he really loved her and couldn’t kill her when the time came. Negan was too weak. Never again. Negan is SO self-righteous and feels justified in what he does. He and his group “save” people. Yet, he brought economy, society, and order to a chaotic group of people. He’s psychotic, but he gets results, damn it! Father Gabe and Negan escape by covering themselves in entrails. They do have to fight, and Negan doesn’t leave the other behind. We also get some REALLY nice close-ups of the walkers in all their nasty, gooey glory.

The generals are meeting on what to do now that Negan is “dead”, and the group is interrupted by the working class of the Saviors. They’re unhappy with the cut back on resources, and concerned about where Negan is. They have a deal after all; they do all the toiling, and the leaders keep them safe. Simon and Regina especially suck at leading, and Regina shoots an upset worker bee. WELL, Negan doesn’t like that, and they all dutifully bow down when he and Gabe come striding in. Sorry kids, dad’s home! The working peeps are glad though, because Negan delivers, after all.

Eugene is feeling the heat to find the one who betrayed them, and before long he figures out its Dwight. He’s got some choices to make. Eugene goes to welcome Gabriel in his cell, and the Father doesn’t look good! In fact, he looks like he’s dying…

Even though we all knew the Rick vs Daryl fight was coming, it was still unpleasant to behold. They BRAWLED. Daryl wants to kill everyone in the Savior’s compound, where Rick only wants to kill the bad ones and not the drones. While they’re wasting time wrestling, the truck with the high powered weapons goes up in flames. Wow. The two go off their separate ways. I wish they would just hug it out.

Rick is going to my Trash people, yay! I miss them! He’s giving them one last shot to join the good guy’s side. Oh, and he sees a HELICOPTER. Yeah, who the hell is that??

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Dead Digest: The Walking Dead (SSN 8, Ep 4)

Episode 4: Some Guy

We get a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it flashback scene of The Kingdom readying for battle before the all-out carnage begins. Ezekiel unburies himself from the bodyguards who sacrificed themselves for him during the ambush. Carol had gone on ahead to scout the building where the shots came from. All around the king is the brutal aftermath of what 50 Caliber ammunition does to body parts. Aaaaaand it’s brutal. Like, bits and pieces blow off, brutal. Immediately I can’t help but notice, where is Shiva?? Where is Jerry?? 

Unfortunately, the good king is not alone. Some random Savior who looks A LOT like Jeffrey Dahmer is taking him hostage and to Negan. The guy really lays into our hero for being a fraud and deceiving those who call him royalty and follow him. Uh, oh, Ez is taking it to heart. Don’t listen to this moron, honey! This ass’s loyalty is to a psycho who makes people call themselves "Negan" and abandon their identities for him. The Dahmer fan is getting sick of Ezekiel slowing him down, (his leg is smashed) so he decided to just take the man’s head as a trophy. Out pops our man, Jerry, to cleave the creep in two with his massive battle axe. SIIIIIIIIIICK. 

Carol is on the move in that building. She’s killing fools, naturally. This pocket of Saviors cannot leave with that heavy artillery! But when she sees Jerry and the King in a standoff with a pack of zombies, she chooses to help her peeps over getting the guns. She has chosen wisely. Carol is always saving everyone’s asses anyway.

But it’s ok! Daryl and Rick appear out of nowhere in hot pursuit of the Saviors and the scary weapons. Daryl is on a bike and Rick is in a jeep. The open top jeep is handy when Rick proves he’s an absolute nut and jumps from his moving vehicle into the one he’s chasing. But his crazy pays off. Guns are secured. 

Jerry, Carol, and a VERY cranky King find the source of that SLIMY dead guy I was really into. Now we have a new really gross breed of toxic waste walkers. It looks like some barrels of suspicious chemicals got into a creek…anyway, there’s the answer. Ezekiel CRACKS. He’s trying to get the others to leave him for dead because he’s “just some guy.” It’s actually a dicey fight against those zombies until the beautiful kitty, Shiva, comes roaring to the rescue. She dies saving them. And this time, I crack. 

Never did I ever think I would shed a tear over the death of an artificial television tiger but, I just did. Why oh why does this feel worse than any human’s death we've had on this damn show?? The trio makes it home. But Ezekiel is not okay. Will he be able to come back from this? Or is this the end of his reign?

King Ezekiel need’s to wake up and remember that his people NEED him. This man become the leader they WANTED. His bravado, his speech and theatrical nature gives them hope and a reason to fight on. You cannot build the amazing, caring, incredibly sufficient community of The Kingdom by just being “some guy.” Wake up Ez! We ALL need you! RIP Shiva, you went out fighting for your man.

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AHS Cult S07xE10 | Charles (Manson) in Charge

      With last week’s episode ending on the eerie cliffhanger that set up the newfound family dynamic between Oz, Kai, and Ally, we were all eager to discover precisely what Ally’s motives were. Hopefully, we’ll find out more in this week’s episode, whose title is a nod to the famous sitcom from the 1980s, “Charles in Charge.” Evan Peters, who has been killing his multiple roles this season, will be portraying the infamous Charles Manson in this week’s episode of Cult. With the finale of what’s been an amazing season coming up just next week, it’s only understandable that my hopes for the penultimate episode are sky-high.

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Charles (Manson) in Charge

Writer(s): Ryan Murphy & Brad Falchuk | Director: Bradley Buecker

    The episode begins with a flashback, which is something that we’re maybe a little too used to seeing this season. However, this flashback contains pertinent information, so I approached it with a welcoming attitude. It’s October 19th, 2016, the day of the final Presidential Debate. Winter and a few of her fellow die-hard Hillary supporters are watching on the couch, mocking Trump and discussing how excited they are to have a female president finally. Winter predicts Trump’s loss will be the largest in the history of the electoral history.  Kai, who’s been busy typing away on online forums, chimes in on Winter’s comment, telling her that plenty of people dislike her and that she’s weak. One of Winter’s friends gets into an incredibly heated debate with Kai about alt-righters like him, resulting in him slapping her and all hell breaking loose, including Winter’s friend pressing charges against him.

     Two weeks later, Kai is in his court-mandated anger management therapy, where we see a familiar face giving him advice. After a few episodes and still not seeing the backstory between Kai and Bebe Babbitt, we are introduced to her as his therapist, who played a much more prominent role in his plan than we could’ve guessed. In one of their sessions, Babbitt brings up Valerie Solanas and some of her beliefs, as well as asking Kai if he was ever interested in politics. Although Bebe considers herself to be a feminist, she tells Kai that Donald Trump is her favorite politician. Her reasoning behind this is that Trump is the first person to hammer away at the female rage that’s been accumulating over the course of history. Bebe encourages Kai to ensue feminine rage within the women around him and break the dam while kissing his forehead and hugging him. I found it very interesting to see that Bebe was the “queen bee” of the hive that assigned Kai this particular purpose, which he took to another level. I knew Kai was cunning and smart, but there had to have been a source of inspiration for his master plan, and I was delighted to discover that cause was Bebe.

     Back in the present day, Kai is rallying in the park with his bodyguards, but we see it first through the perspective of an unhappy Facebook live user. She’s had it with Kai’s unfair Internet policies and all of his bullshit. Kai is growing increasingly anxious that there’s a mole within their group, and that he’s going to get busted for the plethora of crimes he’s committed. After Kai’s done with his drawn-out speech, the protesters attack, unplugging Kai’s speakers and going as far as to pepper spray Kai. Speedwagon is happy to help by washing Kai’s eyes out with milk...I mean, everyone has an extra gallon of milk lying around, right?

    That night, Winter is cleaning the ice cream truck when the creepy music begins to play and Kai, in his overly paranoid state, runs outside and tries to stop it. Ally, who’s also just chilling near the truck, answers questions from Winter about Ivy. Winter wants to know if Ivy was in pain in her last moments because she’s not buying that she went to cooking school in Paris. Winter believes that Kai had something to do with it, and is racked with guilt because she felt that she could’ve stopped it. However, Ally inquires, “If something did happen to Ivy, what makes you think it was Kai?” Oh, shoot!

     As Kai announced in the previous episode, he’s running for Senate and plants to dethrone Herbert Jackson. After Kai’s incident in the park, Jackson tells a local news channel that Kai is a joke. Kai, while disparaging Jackson, gets his crew amped up and of course Gary chimes in with a slightly reworded spiel than Kai’s. After their excitement and attention are present, Kai prepares to tell them a story about Charles Manson…

     Kai transports us to Cielo Drive in Beverly Hills circa 1969. He explains that with the murders on Cielo, Manson was merely lighting the fuse for his ultimate plan. Tex Watson, who was portrayed by Billy Eichner, was in charge of the murders that night, as Charlie stayed back. In addition to Tex, three lovely ladies of AHS accompanied him: Susan Atkins (Sarah Paulson), Patricia Krenwinkel (Leslie Grossman), and Linda Kasabian (Billie Lourd). While Linda stayed back, Tex, Patricia, and Susan killed several people inside the house, including Sharon Tate, the pregnant wife of Roman Polanski. Before going into this episode, I was under the impression that Sharon was going to be portrayed by the lovely Lily Rabe, as it was even cited by IMDB. In the words of Kai, it’s fake news. After the murders, Susan left a sign per Charles’ request, which was the word “pig” written across the door in blood.

     Kai explains that Cielo Drive was just a stepping stone in Charles’ “Helter Skelter” plan, which involved committing crimes and framing random black folks for them to start an apocalyptic race war. Kai wants to live by Manson’s playbook and execute “The Night of a Thousand Tates” in Brookfield Heights.

     Presumably sometime later, Gary heads up to Planned Parenthood in an attempt to acquire names for women planning to have abortions. He breaks in, but the alt-right douchebags don’t go in with him. After wandering around for a little, Gary finds several masked cult members, the last of them being Kai. Gary asks why his Divine Ruler is doing this to him, and Kai responds by saying that Gary needs to be involved in something important and that he will remain in Kai’s heart forever. The cult proceeds to stab and kill him. I can’t be the only one who is thankful we won’t have to deal with him paraphrasing everything Kai says. Gary has always been the most annoying member of the cult in my eyes, so this was a satisfying moment.

     Gary’s dismembered body is positioned in front of the Planned Parenthood, alongside a sign that urges people to “Stop the Slaughter.” Beverly, our go-to anchorwoman, discusses Gary’s death on the news, but something about her seems incredibly off. The tone in which she delivers the gruesome details of Gary’s death is morose and monotone, possibly due to her fear that she’ll be the next member of the cult to be killed off.  While Kai comments on Gary’s murder on the news, he finds a way to blame this all on Senator Jackson. After they’re off the air, Kai smacks the microphone from Bev’s hand in utter disappointment, urging her to report as she typically does, in order to stop arousing suspicions.

     Back in The Butchery on Main, Winter attempts to apologize to Beverly by giving her a way out of the cult. Winter presents Beverly a train ticket to Butte, Montana and an opportunity to start fresh. Beverly (reasonably) sees this as a trick or a test, and despite Winter’s assurance, Beverly tells her that she’d never leave Divine Ruler.

     Back at the Anderson household, Kai is tearing everything apart in search of a recording device planted by this “mole” within the cult. He escapes the beeping by entering the DIY mausoleum, in which he hallucinates Vincent coming back to life and having a conversation with him. Kai decides that he probably shouldn’t have killed Vincent. However, their conversation is cut short by Charles Manson stabbing Vincent and exclaiming that if Kai should hallucinate anybody, it should be him.

     Charles Manson directs Kai to identify the Judas in his cult, stating that his was Linda. Right as Ally discovers a bug planted in the house, Bebe enters the house and berates Kai for not inciting enough female rage within his cult members. Manson tells Kai to explain the truth to Bebe, resulting in him telling her off in a flurry of sexist remarks. Bebe slaps Kai, and just as she’s about to shoot him, Ally gets a headshot in and Bebe falls to the ground. Typical Ally...shooting first and asking questions later.

We now move to Winter giving Kai a buzz cut. I mean, I was never a fan of the blue hair, but it’s become a quintessential part of Kai’s character that I will miss. During this time, the two of them share some fond childhood memories of one another. However, these memories are quickly interrupted by Kai asking why Winter wants to hurt him. Winter says that she ultimately doesn’t want to, but she does need some time away from him. She fears that if she stays, the only way she’ll be able to remember him is through a negative lens. However, Winter reassures Kai that she’ll be here when everyone else has left. Kai encourages Winter to go away if she needs to, even offering her a train ticket to Butte, Montana! Oh, no! Winter’s dragged away by Kai’s douchey followers.

     We move to Kai interrogating Winter, asking if the Feds offered her something in order for her to snitch. He truly believes that Winter is the mole. Ally found a secret microphone stitched into his couch cushion, as well as a recorder placed in the ice cream truck by what they assume to be Winter. However, although this was initially presented to us, it doesn’t mean it’s true. AHS has a way of presenting false recollection of events to us rather frequently, so I’m not going to accept this as true as of right now. Winter advises Ally that Kai is just going to chew her up and spit her out like he’s done to everyone else, and Ally replies by saying, “Too bad you won’t be around to see it.”

     Kai urges Winter to confess for her infidelities towards the cult, but she just can’t, because she didn’t do them. Kai proceeds to strangle Winter to death...nooo! Speedwagon races to his car and takes off his wire, breaking it. Ally steps into the car and says, “Hello, Speedwagon.”

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Afterthoughts

     All in all, Charles (Manson) In Charge proved to be an enjoyable penultimate episode. It answered some of our long-awaited questions, tied up some storylines nicely, and left us yearning for more with that crazy cliffhanger. I’m dying to see where Ally and Speedwagon will go. One one hand, they could be in cahoots and attempting to take down Kai, but on the other, Ally could take down Speedwagon just to be the one to take down Kai. Either way, it’s going to be crazy. I must say, I’m very upset that Winter died. Billie Lourd was a breath of fresh air to the AHS cast, and I can only hope she’ll return next year. I’m very eager to see the finale and recap it for you all! It’s been a blast doing these recaps, and I hope you’ve enjoyed them almost as much as I have enjoyed writing them.

Thanks for reading,
Jonah

Jonah Raleigh

Though much too modest to admit it himself, Jonah is perhaps the world's preeminent AHS expert. He loves talking film & television, building his fledgling vinyl and Blu-Ray collection, & having far too many coffee drinks. Jonah can often be found binge watching shows with his handsome one-eyed ocicat, Irving.

Dead Digest: The Walking Dead (SSN 8, Ep 3)

Episode 3: Monsters

Oh lordy, I love this title. We’ve all heard the show’s tagline, “Fear the living, fight the dead” these past seasons. I feel like we are going to be pushing and exploring that theme. Fissures are forming. Can the group of super friends stay together? Or will they be driven apart?

Good King Ezekiel kicks things off with a fancy speech. That beautiful man. It’s brief and full of Dungeons and Dragons-like prose. He and Carol’s team are a well-oiled machine for the whole episode until they get ambushed. It looks like we will lose some members of the Kingdom today, but we won’t find out who and how many tonight. I just noticed Ezekiel added a nifty red feather to his dread’s at some point. 

We all know the man with a gun in Rick’s face. We met him a LONG time ago, when Shane was still alive (remember Shane?!?)! He was lost until the Savior’s gave him purpose. We hear him doing the old, “we’re not so different, Rick, you and I…” speech until Daryl sneaks up and gives him a bolt to the head. Rick points out they knew him, and our resident biker seems indifferent. Probably not the reaction Rick was hoping for. After lots and lots of guns firing, (we win, yay!) it looks like Rick and Daryl will be heading out, when some geeky kid from the Saviors shoots at them. The nerve. Anyway, Rick gives his word that if the guy comes out and gives them info about where the heavy artillery was moved to, they’ll give him a car and he can leave. He obliges, and Daryl AGAIN shoots to kill. Rick, AGAIN seems taken aback. Clearly he and Daryl need to have a chat because they’re not on the same page right now. 

Speaking of, Jesus/Tara/Morgan’s group are marching on to Hilltop with the POW’s roped together. Jesus points out to the naysayers that they all kill, but to kill those who surrender would be execution. Which is tacky and wrong. The party comes under attack from walkers and one section of the chain gang runs off. Their leader is that one really nasty chap with the long hair. Anyway, we get to see some great gory zombie stuff. Including an especially gruesome head bite. Morgan takes off after the escapees and shoots one! Jesus interferes, saving the prisoners. Badass Morgan has met his match in Jesus who is apparently Steven Segal in disguise. Reality hits and Morgan knows he’s cracking. He knows he cannot stay here and stay sane, so he appears to…leave. Oh, do you hear that sound?? That is my heart BREAKING. My precious Morgan is leaving me. Again. I hate it when he does this. Come back soon, please.

ANNNNND on the topic of heart break, we have Aaron and Eric. Eric’s gunshot proves fatal, and the couple share a good-bye moment beneath a tree. As if this beautiful scene was not terrible enough, it gets worse. Aaron leaves to fight (at Eric’s insistence) and when he comes back for his man, he sees newly formed Eric-zombie shambling off. There wouldn’t have been time to save him, but talk about insult to injury. Aaron loses it, and so do we all. When he’s composed, he offers to take baby Gracie back to Hilltop. He and Eric were supposed to return there, and he needs purpose. Aaron, you are a beautiful soul that we do not deserve. I am officially not happy about Eric passing. I don’t like yet another queer character dying off. BUT splitting up couple’s with death is a common theme on the show. It’s happened before and will happen again regardless of sexual orientation. Why do we fans love this torture??

Disgraced Gregory shows up at Hilltop. He begs and pleads with Maggie and she lets him back in after she yells a lot. She knows she can’t trust him, and will probably kill him eventually, but for now she chooses mercy. Jesus and the gang show up with the POW’s. Maggie isn’t pleased to see them, much to Jesus’s dismay (I assume). Yet, what can she do? Keeping these people alive is the righteous thing to do. 

These cracks are slowly but surely forming and splintering our friends apart...Let’s close on an image of the Slimy Walker from the other night that I loved.
 

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AHS Cult S07xE09 | Drink The Kool-Aid

      Although I’ve gone into every episode of this season eagerly, my interest was immeasurably piqued when I discovered that the lovely Angela Bassett would be directing “Drink The Kool-Aid.” Aside from being a fantastic addition to the cast over the past few seasons, she also has displayed her directing skills to us in arguably the only noteworthy episode of Roanoke last year. Cult has already been bringing us remarkable episodes this season, and having Bassett in the mix would only make sense when it comes to delivering top-notch quality. I’m going into this episode with high expectations and the hope that we won’t see as many flashbacks. I love American Horror Story, but dear Lord, I am growing very intolerant of this overabundance of flashbacks, especially the irrelevant and extended ones. Nevertheless, I am very excited to recap/review this episode for you all...it should be a special one!

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Drink The Kool-Aid

Writer: Adam Penn | Director: Angela Bassett

   Our episode opens with Kai narrating various stories revolving around cult leaders and their corresponding suicide pacts, all portrayed by Evan Peters. Kai brushes over Marshall Applewhite and his cult, Heaven’s Gate, ingesting a poisonous pudding concoction. However, they didn’t die but merely graduated into the next stage of their life. We also learn a little bit about David Koresh, the fearless leader of Branch Davidians whose sperm was godlike. Koresh dissolved all of the marriages within his cult and fathered all of the children with his “holy ejaculate” while the rest of the men remained celibate. When the law came down on them, some people took suicide pills, while others died in the fire or were shot.

   However, Kai hones in on Jim Jones, the infamous man behind the Jonestown massacre who originated the term “drink the Kool-Aid.” Jones was the founder of the People’s Temple, who were blind to the divisions of race, class, and sex. The cult moved to Guyana  to form a utopia of sorts, but a congressman tried to infiltrate it. 918 individuals died at the helm of a gun or a cup filled with poisoned Kool-Aid. Jones told everyone in the cult that they weren’t committing suicide, but rather partaking in a revolutionary act.

   These various stories Kai has introduced to us ultimately ended up being a bedtime story he was telling to his alt-right douchebags, to compare himself to these men and emphasize the strong bond the cult members harbored for their leaders. Kai asks his bodyguards, who are all christened with hilarious names such as Pus Bucket, Heart Attack, Tripod, Speedwagon, etc., if they would be willing to make the “ultimate sacrifice” for him, receiving an affirmative response from all of them.

   We’re now at a City Council meeting, wherein Kai is proposing that website he personally deems offensive shall be banned from all residents of Brookfield Heights. Although this perfectly exemplifies censorship, Kai likes to think of this as “regulation”. Kai naturally receives some backlash from Perry, so he turns to Councilman Moyer, who appears to have taking a beating from Kai’s brainwashed buddies. He agrees unenthusiastically, as does the rest of board, and the motion passes. On top of this, Kai announces that he’s going to be running for U.S. Senate in 2018. Perry tries to tell him that he has no chance in hell because the current senator is a popular incumbent who’s served three terms. With a grim smirk on his face, Kai tells him that anything can happen. We’ve all seen what he means by this and the extremes he will go to in order to get his way...R.I.P, Sally Keffler.

   Back in the Mayfair-Richards’ household, Ally needs an explanation as to why Ivy up and joined a cult. Ivy responds by saying there was no real structure in her life and she needed somebody to tell her where to go and what to do. Ivy was incredibly resentful towards Ally and felt that driving her crazy brought her relief. However, all of that didn’t come without the burden of guilt when it came to the various people she killed. Now that Ivy’s spoken her mind, she’s all like,“What’s your excuse for joining, bitch?” Ally explains that Ivy gave her no choice but to join, knowing that she wouldn’t leave unless Ally rescued her. Ally adds that she came back for Ozzy, too.

   Speaking of Oz, him and Winter show up. Ally gives Ozymandias a Twisty comic book as a reparation for her absence over the last month or so. Thank the Lord! We saw a lot of Twisty in the earlier episodes of the season, but his involvement as a pop culture icon tapered off throughout the rest of the season. Quite honestly, I thought they’d forgotten about him. When I first glanced at the comic book, I assumed it was another chapter in the Twisty chronicles. However, once I paused and scrutinized it, I discovered it was called “Freaks,” and featured Pepper, Jimmy Darling, and Meep! Oh, how I miss all of them.

   After Oz heads upstairs to read his comic, Winter begins to apologize to Ally. Ally bleakly responds, “For what? Fucking my wife, driving me crazy, or trying to kill me?” Oh snap, bitch! Winter explains how heavily she relied on her family in the wake of the election, but after Kai killed Vince, she made the tough decision to escape the cult. Winter hands Ally a pamphlet she found on WikiHow of all places, entitled “How To Escape from a Cult in 14 Steps”. Just in case we weren’t aware of how much of a millennial Winter was, she does shit like this just to prove it... absolutely golden. They come to an agreement to flee from the cult, and Ally says that “she will fucking get Oz” when Winter offers it up.

   Much to their dismay, Pus Bucket and the rest of Kai’s clique bang on the door and inform the ladies of an emergency meeting at the Anderson household. Once they arrive, Beverly smacks the hell out of Winter, and a fight ensues. Kai says they need to surpass this petty bullshit to cross a new threshold, while bringing out a pot of Kool-Aid. Here we go…

   All of the women in the cult begin to lose their shit when Kai informs them they all need to drink the Kool-Aid to become a more significant person after their death. When he points to a member, they must drink. Kai calls on Pus Bucket first, but his fear of death overruled his loyalty to Kai and Gary shoots him consequently. Kai now points to the women, and we hear the classic Sarah Paulson wailing that we’ve all come to recognize and either love or hate. The rest of the cult drinks and after not instantly dying, it becomes prevalent that there was absolutely nothing in the Kool-Aid. Kai announces, “Why would I kill us? I’m running for Senate, and dead people can’t vote!” According to Kai, there was nothing in the raspberry Kool-Aid besides proof of their fidelity and loyalty to Kai. Now, many of you may be wondering why Kai would force such a twisted and sordid test upon his followers, but I’m more confused as to why he would use such a gross flavor like raspberry. I mean, if you’re going to bring on death-induced fear to your supporters, at least have it be represented in a cherry or grape flavoring!

   After Kai’s dishonorable prank, Ally and Ivy have decided to go through with their plan. They’re going to pick up Oz from school and never look back. Ivy’s concerned about Winter after they leave, and she has a right to be. If Kai found out that she was involved with their escape, he would kill her instantly. They pull up to the pick-up line, and Ally is informed that Winter picked up Oz thirty minutes ago with Kai.

   Back in Kai’s basement, Oz wants to know where his mommies are and Kai continues to probe him and taunt him with the thought of his “daddy” and the belief that he needs a male role model in his life. Kai eventually ropes him into a pinky power, looking to tell him a secret. Ally and Ivy sprint into the house, pushing one of Kai’s hilariously-named sidekicks out of the way and bitchslapping Winter in the process. To be fair, Winter deserves it after all the bullshit she’s pulled this season, but damn! Winter is getting the worst of it this episode. Ally and Ivy make it downstairs in the basement just in time to knock the Kool-Aid out of Oz’s hand that Kai was trying to get him to drink. Oz gets upset and says that he just wants to stay with his “daddy” tonight and Kai refers to him as his son. Okay, what the fuck is going on? Dear God, please tell me that Kai isn’t Oz’s father.

   Kai provides some compelling information that he donated to the Braddon Clinic, which is where Ally and Ivy got their sperm. Oz pushes to have a sleepover with his “daddy,” and Ally and Ivy just sort of cave. Eager to discover if Kai is, in fact, Oz’s baby daddy, Ivy scrounges up their file containing information about their sperm donor. In their record, it doesn’t give out the donor’s name or picture but provides personal traits such as medical history, height/weight, etc.

   Ally is cooking dinner for the both of them as Ivy’s belief that Kai is Oz’s father stands stronger than ever. Unlike her typical paranoid ways, Ally doubts that Oz is Kai’s son and encourages Ivy to calm down.

   While eating her pasta and drinking her red wine, Ivy is confused because Ally isn’t eating at all. Uh oh, I see precisely where this is heading. Ally begins her monologue regarding her experiences at the psych ward, explaining that in the very first week, she had suicidal thoughts and began to dwell on the fact that Ivy left her in there without as much as a single word. In the second week, however, she pulled herself together and was able to focus her energy on freeing herself of her fears that once dominated her. Once she cured herself of her various grandiose phobias, she used all of her newfound power to exact her revenge on Ivy. Ivy responds to this by saying that this is the side of Ally she’s always wanted to see, but it won’t last. Ivy says that Ally will be cowering in just a few days and that she’d never do anything to her, but Ally merely says, “I already have.” It turns out Ally has put arsenic in the wine and pasta and that pretty soon, Ivy will be dead. Ivy says that Oz will never forgive her for this, but Ally reports to the contrary, Ozzy won’t forgive her for abandoning their family. OH MY GOSH! I am living for this new Ally...I love the bad bitch she’s become. Ally went from being afraid of everything to being the thing that everyone’s scared of.

  We return to the Anderson crib, where Kai is telling another bedtime story to his followers and Ozzy, regarding the finale of the Jonestown massacre. According to Kai, Jones was taken to Heaven after his death, and he also portrays Jesus coming down and kissing Jones. After he is resurrected, Jim Jones gained the ability to revive t all of his followers, and they all lived happily ever after. Although Kai’s loyal buffoons think this story is beautiful, Oz pulls up a Wikipedia page and sassily informs everyone of the harsh reality of the Jonestown massacre and its conclusion. Kai, enraged by the “fake news” Oz has been spreading, breaks his phone and sentences him to a timeout.

   Ally comes to pick up her kiddo the next day, but apparently, he isn’t there. Ally tells one of the bodyguards to inform Kai that dinner will be at her house tonight, and she’ll be making manwiches. Completing the rest of her errands for the day, Ally heads to the Braddon Clinic and attempts to obtain a picture of Oz’s actual father. After begging doesn’t work, Ally slips the nurse an envelope filled with cash that she proceeds to stuff in her bra and she receives the verdict. Kai Anderson, you are…NOT the father! After being relieved by this revelation, Ally asks for just one more favor from the nurse.

   At their dinner together, Ally informs Kai that Ozymandias actually means, “king of kings”. I believe I discussed the backstory of Oz’s name and what it could indicate in an earlier recap, but I am glad we are finally discovering its significance. Kai asks where Ivy is, and Ally bluntly and proudly states that she killed her and she’s in their trunk. It turns out Ally’s favor from the nurse was using her Microsoft Word abilities to create a fake donor file for Kai, which Kai surprisingly accepts to be true. Kai cries tears of joy because they finally have made the Messiah baby. We watch as they carry Ivy’s corpse to the DIY mausoleum. When Ally guides her towards the bed, Kai informs Ally that the bed is just for family, which leads to them dropping her on the floor.

   Ally, Ozzy, and Kai share a warm embrace in Dr. Vincent’s office, and Kai softly says, “Now we can be a real family.” WOW!

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Afterthoughts

   Honestly, this episode was freaking incredible. Just when I think I have a favorite episode of the season, the writers and directors up the ante and continue to provide a new favorite for me week by week. I adored Evan Peters’ portrayal of the various cult leaders and Jesus...he looked different in every segment, and I think it was incredible. I love the “new Ally” and her wicked ways. I hope that she uses Kai’s belief that Oz is his son to her advantage and uses it to gain control/power over Kai. I was living for Oz’s sass this episode. Also, there weren’t any flashbacks this episode, simply Kai’s portrayal of the various leaders, which was so damn entertaining. There are just two more episodes left in this season, and I expect nothing short of greatness from what’s turning out to be an astounding season.

Thanks for reading,
Jonah

Jonah Raleigh

Though much too modest to admit it himself, Jonah is perhaps the world's preeminent AHS expert. He loves talking film & television, building his fledgling vinyl and Blu-Ray collection, & having far too many coffee drinks. Jonah can often be found binge watching shows with his handsome one-eyed ocicat, Irving.